iPHONE 5

Meanwhile, everybody can't wait for Apple to finally launch the iPhone 5, because the previous four iPhones we all own just seem clunky now, right? The iPhone 5 is "even more highly anticipated than the iPhone 4," If you can believe that, says BGR. The demand is "unprecedented," concurs Apple 2.0. "Higher than ever before," adds Perez Hilton, finding a different way to say the same thing. "No surprises here, especially since Sprint will finally be selling them too!" So, to recap: poverty and iPhone demand have both reached unprecedented levels. Guess we have to take the bad news with the good. According to photos we've seen from the Great Depression of the 1930s, the last time poverty was this rough, people were lining up for actual apples.